Do you struggle with your emotions? Do you feel them or do you suppress them? Do you let yourself cry? How do you work through them?
Most of us are afraid to really feel our feelings, we are afraid of losing control, afraid of the pain involved in feeling our emotions, of feeling the sense of loss or failure or whatever the emotion brings with it. But this is what makes you human; so much of life is about what you feel rather than what you think. It is essential for us to be strongly connected to our emotional world, if we expect to live a life filled with vitality, fulfillment, satisfaction and inner peace.
I remember growing up it was very difficult for me to deal with and calm my emotions. I had always experience very turbulent hard emotions that literally took over me, my emotions controlled me. Until I came to a point where those strong, negative emotions became so intolerable that all I wanted was peace above all else. And with that strong desire, I was able to start making the necessary changes that brought calmness into my life and allowed me to feel what inner peace feels like. See strong and heavy emotions takes us out of our peaceful center making it harder to hear the quiet voice of our Higher Self.
Too often many of don’t realize that we are actually addicted to emotional drama, because somehow it makes us feel more alive when we have strong turbulent emotions. Some people even confuse intensity with love, and therefore are addicted to high, intense feelings and unconsciously they create drama in order to feel them. Think about someone you might know, someone whose life is always filled with emotional drama. This person somehow always manages to find themselves in the middle of an emotional drama. To let go of the drama you have to ready to look at yourself and decide that inner peace is more important to you than anything else.
Say to yourself: ‘I choose peace, above all else”
CONFRONT YOUR EMOTIONS HEAD ON
The best way of dealing with your emotions is to confront them head on; by experiencing them and letting them flow right through you rather than resisting or suppressing them. Emotions focus you in time and space and it’s what propels your thoughts into manifestation. E-motion is really energy in motion, its like a moving force field that’s pulsing through your body. And like one of the most basic physical law; Conservation of Energy teaches us, that energy cannot be created nor destroyed; it can only be changed from one form to another. So if our emotions are literally energy, one cannot simply suppress them in hopes that they will go away. When you try to resist or suppress your emotions they are not going away, all that happens is that the energy is changing forms, but it’s still very much alive and living in your physical and emotional body.
When you don’t deal with them, when you ignore your emotions, especially when they are at a lower level of intensity-they will grow stronger. Which is what you see happening when someone has a sudden outburst of intense emotions in a moment that did not require for that level of intensity.
Think of it like this…
If you do not pay attention when you’re slightly being taking advantage of by another, they will continue to take advantage of you and drain your energy until you “get it”. They will exhaust you more and more until you stop them either by ending the relationship or by speaking assertively and communicating your feelings of what you will and will not accept in that relationship. The majority of people’s response is to ignore their emotions, because we are in fear. But you cannot ignore, push away and pretend your emotions aren’t there or force yourself to feel something you do not.
You could try but, it will still be there. It will simply have changed forms. You have now repressed those emotions and they will get buried into your subconscious and/or unconscious mind, remaining alive inside of you – whether you are aware of it or not. The difference is that now those repressed emotions will be directing your life without your awareness. And sooner or later they will show up in unhealthy, even destructive ways.
When you are highly emotional about an issue, it is much more difficult for you to reason, to take action and to see the different options available to you. It’s very difficult to understand that another person cannot cause us unhappy emotions, it’s much easier to blame another for making us angry or for feeling hurt but when we do this we are turning our power over to others and allowing them to determine how we feel and deal with our emotions.
HOW WE SUPPRESS OUR EMOTIONS
Too often we dismiss our emotion by either getting busy, exercising more, drinking or eating a bit more, or just straight up ignoring your feelings… When you do not feel your emotion(s) They stay in your body; muscles, ligaments, stomach, aura etc.. Emotions that are buried long-term are the ones that normally create physical illness.
The following are a few examples of the methods you might use to avoid feeling:
- Eating foods loaded with sugar and fat
- Excessive drinking of alcohol
- Excessive use of recreational drugs
- Using prescription drugs such as tranquilizers or Prozac
- Exercising compulsively
- Any type of compulsive behavior
- Excessive sex with or without a partner
- Always keeping busy so you can’t feel
- Constant intellectualizing and analyzing
- Excessive reading or TV
- Working Excessively
- Keeping conversations superficial
- Burying angry emotions under the mask of peace and love
Again this why, it so important that you find a process that allows you to release the emotions from the both your emotional & physical body. Transforming the energy into a form that is healing and cleansing. One that will provide you with clarity along with the understanding that will lead you to act in higher and higher ways.
So lets get into it.
(3) Step Process to Feel and Transfer your Emotions
There are many different processes you can try out to see what best works for you. I want to share with you one of the processes I created for myself, that helps me go through my emotions quicker and with more ease. It’s called:
SEE IT, FEEL IT AND TRANSFORM
STEP ONE- SEE IT
- Means you need to acknowledge what you are actually feeling in the moment. You need to bring awareness to the feelings that come up for and notice when you are being triggered. As an example you’re having a conversation with someone and all of a sudden you start to feel insecure or maybe uncomfortable, in that moment you need to bring awareness to the emotions that are coming up for you.
STEP TWO – FEEL IT
Once you’ve acknowledge your emotion and brought awareness to it and the trigger in the moment. Then you allow yourself to fully experience the emotion, without thinking about what caused the emotions. Your job here is not to think, only to feel. Cry it out if you need to, crying is a great way to release or loosen the emotions from you physical body.
Allow the emotion(s) to come up in your body, don’t push it down, don’t talk yourself out of the feeling and please don’t judging yourself for what you’re feeling. Judging slows down or halts the process of simply feeling sensations. Accept that whatever you’re feeling is okay. The goal here is to feel the emotion in your body. Perhaps warmth , coolness, an area of heaviness or light. The impression of a color or pulsation, soreness, numbers, sharp pain etc…
- Where in your body is the emotion located? What does it feel like? What color is it?
This is a space of exploration for you to just have the feeling and sensation without interpretations or storytelling. As you work with feeling your emotions in your body take note of your experience; by either journaling, painting, drawing or even dancing (movement). If you are journaling, which I highly recommend. Write down as much of your experience as you can, fast without stopping to check for spelling or thinking. Simply allow the pen to move and write. Giving texture and color to your experience by drawing or painting your internal world is just as valuable. Movement through dance is another great form of feeling, giving life and transforming your emotions
STEP THREE – TRANSFORM IT
The way to transform your emotions, is through self reflection.
- Seek to now find the higher perspective, the message or lesson in the situation that triggered the emotion(s) in you. You’re always going to transform your emotions by seeking out the bigger picture.
- What did you learn from this experience? What hidden gift did this situation that evoked the emotion(s) in you, show you? Did the situation remind you of something hurtful from your past? If your negative emotions are trigger by another person take a closer look – are you accepting other people for who they are? Are you withholding your love until they become or give you what you want?
- Seek to find what you are learning from your turbulent emotions. Remember negative and intense emotions are indicators that you are not following the path and guidance of your Higher Self – you’re out of alignment. And the further away you get from your Higher Self the harder things become and the more turbulence your emotions maybe.
Illustration Video ( In this video I share with you two stories, of things I was going through and how I used the process. ) – See it, Feel it and Transform it
Dealing with emotions, especially negative ones is not an easy task. But it is important to remember that masking emotions is only a short term “solution” with long term repercussions. Besides, it isn’t a real solution it’s only a temporary fix that is bound to backfire, at a later stage. Instead sit with your emotions, acknowledge them, feel them and work with them. You can always ask for guidance from your Higher Self whenever you have feelings of irritability, resentment or negativity. Ask your Higher Self What is the message? What do you need to look at in your life or do differently? and then wait for the answer to reveal itself to you…
To dive a little deeper (since you know I am about helping you) I created a 17 page Emotional Assessment Playbook for YOU.
Let me know in the comments what emotion(s) you tend experience the most? And please share this post in Pinterest or Facebook to help others within their own inner journey.